would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize