Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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