all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
