Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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