so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
