is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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