Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
