Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
