he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
