I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize