I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize