How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Randomize
