Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
This is the high leading the old right now
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
