Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
