Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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