I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Randomize
