There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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