so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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