Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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