honey bunches of taint.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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