You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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