Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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