Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
