Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
This baby is an asshole
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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