I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize