We are two peas in an std pod
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
