i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Dicks are not precious.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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