are you still at the devil's house?
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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