it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
