Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Why can't burritos get me drunk
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
