i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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