I hate your face
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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