So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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