Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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