I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
