omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
