if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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