when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize