dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
