Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
