i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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