He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
