Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
