apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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