Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize