just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
