that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You made out with two different species that night
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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