i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
