Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
