can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You need a sexual gate keeper
We need a shit load of segways right now
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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