please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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